Four rules to live by (and forget about the underwear)

 

Always wear clean undergarments with no holes in them. And so mothers everywhere will warn you. A rule to live by. “What if you have an accident and have to go to hospital?” Well, yeah, eh? But my mother, at least, never told me that red-blooded, hairy-chested hombres such as I would come to be risk even greater embarrassments.

honda dreamOccupational hazards. 

The magazine was going through a let’s-economize-on-expenses phase, is why I was headed back to my hotel in … Read more

Rule to live by #2: Always drink pastis in full midday sun.

Pastis

This is in response to S. Tsow’s comment on my last post.

sidewalk-cafe-lunch-on-the-terrace-burgundy-lion-pub-st-henri-montreal-scene-carole-spandau-carole-spandau

 

Cautionary note. Ease off when your brain begins to bubble.

PastisResults of the latest field trial. Once again I have followed my rule, and once again, this day following, I find cause to question it.

hangovers joy of

 

 

Bonus lore. Rx for hangovers: The Joy of Hangovers

Tbe cafe is the work of Carole Spandau

 

Rule to live by #1: Bring black peppercorns to any dope-smoking contest the like of which nobody is likely to win

peppercorns drawing

The fix. Neil Young, in a Rolling Stone interview with Howard Stern, offers this treatment for weed-induced paranoia: chew some ‘black pepper balls.’ I’m thinking he must mean peppercorns.

neil young heart of gold

peppercorn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On the off chance that peppercorns are the latest panacea, I tried chewing just two of them. Not because I’d been smoking dope, and not because I was feeling especially paranoid. Just because like, whatever, eh? And they were good. Not as good … Read more